This stain remover is for fabric but it works wonders on my countertops
- February 15, 2023
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This is Highly Recommend, a column dedicated to what people in the food industry are eating, drinking and buying right now. Here Zoe Denenberg writes about Defunkify, the stain remover she uses on her couch and countertops.
As someone who spent way too much time watching QVC as a kid, I have a soft spot for products that claim to perform everyday miracles. I’m also an incredibly messy cook and eater, so it’s really no surprise that I was drawn to Defunkify, a cleaning brand with a self-proclaimed “magic stain remover” that treats every fabric. What’s surprising, however, is how much I love and have come to rely on this humble cleaning spray – and not just for fabric stains.
Defunkify Stain Remover Spray (2 Pack)
Defunkify’s spot spray removes coffee splatters from my white terrycloth bathrobe. It gets chocolate off my white couch pretty much once a week (why did I even buy a white couch?) and did an act of God on the white linen pants I once wore to an underground rave. The stain-fighting solution works quickly without leaving weird water stains or a chemical smell – it’s free of synthetic fragrances, phosphates or dyes commonly found in other cleaning products.
So far I haven’t found a stain that this spray can’t remove. But its most impressive feat, true Olympic-level feat, happened not on fabric – the surface it’s designed to treat – but on my white stone countertop.
A few months ago I hosted my first Shabbat dinner in my new apartment – an affair with plenty of challah and red wine. Unfortunately, none of my guests used the coasters that I suggestedly set up at the beginning of the evening. Cleanup time ticked by and my stomach sank when I discovered three rings of red wine staining my beautiful white counter.
Resisting the urge to panic, I dug pretty much every cleaning product out of the black hole of a cabinet under my sink. I started with an all-natural all-purpose spray and, when that proved ineffective, switched to glass cleaner (nope), a citrus-scented deep cleaning mist (go fish) and, as a final effort, to a mystery solution with a label written entirely in Italian (very slick , but not a cube). The red wine stains growled at me, seeping deeper into the stone by the minute.
Still tipsy and losing all hope, I spotted my bottle of Defunkify fabric stain remover and thought, “Why not?” I spritzed on the stubborn red wine rings and let it sit while I began the dishes. Five minutes and all mourning periods later, a mere wipe with a paper towel revealed that the Defunkify spray had completely dissolved the stains. They had literally disappeared.
While I still use an all-purpose spray for everyday cleaning, I call on this powerful stain killer for the toughest jobs: spilled matcha, turmeric-tinted curry, and splattered tomato sauce. A two-pack costs $20, and if you can get through it as fast as me, you can sign up for a subscription.
As it turns out, I’m not the only one using this spray well beyond its intended purpose. Hundreds of 5 star reviews claim this stain remover works on clothes, carpets, sofas, walls, granite and just about any other surface. Diesel mechanic and avid reviewer Joanna B. uses it to scrub motor oil and hydraulic fluid out of “jeans, canvas, and various other materials.” But for me, a messy person who for some reason loves the color white, the alchemy performed on my countertop will always be the biggest trick of this spray.